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Lesbian YouTuber Hartbeat Shares Her Schizophrenia Diagnosis

"This is worse than coming out as gay."

Queer YouTuber Hartbeat released a video earlier this week detailing her struggles with schizophrenia.

Hart, as she's better known, first rose to prominence in 2013 when she created a hilarious YouTube video challenging masculine stereotypes by dancing around in a watermelon bikini.

Since then, she's amassed thousands of fans and created a vast collection of funny, smart and insightful videos that explore the various aspects of her identity.

While most of her vlogs rely on her special brand of explosive humor, the 27-year-old decided to go serious for a video Monday in which she revealed to her fans that she's been struggling with schizophrenia since she was 19.

“Hi, my name is Hart and I’m schizophrenic," she began.

“I’ve been trying to do this video for the last three years,” she explained, “and every single time, it always ends up the same way: either I look like a hot-a** mess, or I instantly become scared. But what is real, is real.”

Though Hart doesn't provide a definition of the disease for her viewers, Mental Health America notes that “someone with schizophrenia may have difficulty distinguishing between what is real and what is imaginary; may be unresponsive or withdrawn; and may have difficulty expressing normal emotions in social situations.”

As the comedienne herself stated, there is no known cure or cause for schizophrenia.

“This is worse than coming out as gay—for me, at least,” she continued. “Every single time I [perform] stand-up, I always say that there are only five things about me that society doesn’t understand and loves to hate on: being black, being gay, being fat as f*ck, being a woman and having crooked, but lovely teeth.”

“But I would never, like, speak on what I struggle with mentally, and what makes this awkward for me is that all of the other s**t [I go through]—I have no problem talking [about] all of that...but talking about this? I’m scared as f*ck as to how this is going to affect me.”

Toward the end of the video, she admitted that she was motivated to finally speak about her struggles with mental illness so people would know they're not alone.

“I never bring this up, because there’s already a lot that [I’ve] f*cking accomplished, [but] I feel like it’s necessary right now [because] I know [people] need to hear that [they’re] not alone, that there's somebody else out in the world, just like you, just like this, who just so happens to be a really successful person."

Hart says she doesn't want to be the go-to advocate for schizophrenia, but that she was brave enough to share her story with the world will undoubtedly bring strength and solace to many.

h/t: Inquisitr

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